| "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...", but for now, it is the best of times because I am in temporary bliss. My dream world known as sleep. I leave this on so as to wake up to a message from %n. |
| "No! Put that down! Omg, *crash*, no, that was $100! Not on the couch! No, that's a white couch! No!" In case you can't tell, I'm babysitting. |
| *Screams as the baby threatens me for milk* |
| 1 sheep, 2 sheep, 3 sheep, 4 sheep, Zzzzzzzzzzzzz! |
| 2 out of 3 voices in my head are telling me to go to bed. Even if the voices aren't real, they have some pretty good ideas. |
| 4 out of 5 voices in my head say go back to sleep. |
| 54,55,56... Shhh! I'm counting sheep. |
| ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTYVWXYZzzzz... |
| Annoying babies grow into annoying kids, I'm off watching this process. |
| B is for Barely surviving. A is for Always Annoying. B is for Boring late shows. Y is for Yearning for home. S is for Shut up being yelled at kids. I is for Isolating. T is for Time to go home. T is for Tiring. I is for Ignoring the kids. N is for Never fun. G is for GETTING CASH!!!! LOL!!! TTYL!!! |
| Babysitting 101:First step-Get pillow, Second step-place child on pillow, Third Step-place pillow over child, Fourth step-find good book to read, Step Five-sit on child and read book. Thanks for attending my babysitting class. I am now excersising my ways of teaching by practicing the following steps! |
| Babysitting! I'll be back when I finish tying the kids to a chair!! TTYL!! |
| Cleaning up baby throw up. I shouldn't have put that beer in her bottle! oops! |
| Counting sheep, be back in the morning. |
| Doing some quality blanket and pillow bonding time. |
| Don't you just hate it when people leave their away message on when they are sleeping? |
| Dreaming... Please do not disturb. |
| Even superheroes need their sleep. |
| Ever have to babysit an annoying little kid who can't take hint and won't leave you alone...I'm dealing with that right now. Can't talk right now because I'm teaching %n the meaning of the word BABY-SITTING. |
| Everyone thinks I like to sleep. It's not that I like it, I'm just really good at it. |
| Everyone thinks I like to sleep. It's not that I like to sleep, it's just that I don't like to get up. |
| Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite. |
| Goodbye cruel world! ...Until tomorrow morning, that is. |
| Goodnight moon and stars. |
| Goodnight, I 'll see you in my dreams. |
| Hello pillow, have you met my face? |
| Hello... My name is (YOUR NAME HERE) and I'm a sleepaholizzzzzzzz... |
| Heres the scoop, im not here right now because I'm cleaning up poop! The babies are crying and the tots are screaming when the parents see this they'll be STEAMING! Im sposed to be working not talking to you so I'm not here and I'm cleaning up poo! |
| Hey cant talk, I got to little brats on my hand, called my brother and sister! I CANT BELIEVE IM NOT GETTING PAID for THIS! |
| Hi I am sorry but I am babysitting little brats at the momment(ugh) but maybe I will invite you to the party I will be holding at their house once they fall asleep. |
| Hurting...I mean watching the brats from next door...it?s a dirty job but someone has gotta do it. |
| I am a sleepaholic and I am feeding my addiction. |
| I am always confused when people ask me did you sleep good? I always wonder if they want me to say no, I made a few mistakes. |
| I am currently analyzing the patterns of light as they permeate the membranes of my eyelids to learn the meaning of life. |
| I am currently staring at the inside of my eyelids. |
| I am in the middle of a really long blink. Leave a messeage. |
| I can't sleep and I already tried counting sheep,"sigh" I wish I could count past 10. |
| I can't sleep because I'm depressed but I'm depressed beacause I can't sleep. |
| I feel sorry for all of you who take forever to fall asleep. I can do it like a snap! I could even fall asleep right here on the keyb-- ghtufkndyghdhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..... |
| I got this disease called sleepiness. |
| I hate my alarm clock... because it works so well. |
| I have a date with my blanket. |
| I know I don't need any more beauty sleep but I'm going to get some more sleep anyways. |
| I know I don't need any more beauty sleep... I just really enjoy sleeping. |
| I never have any time to get any work done... I am taking a nap now, so leave a message. |
| I pulled an all-nighter being awake! Now I'm pulling an all-dayer being asleep! |
| I swear, I'm paying attention to you. The pillow and drool are just here for decoration. |
| I value my sleep, and if you value your life, you'll let me get my rest. |
| I wasn't sleeping... I was just picking up my contacts without any hands. |
| I'll be comfortably unconscious for the next 8 hours. |
| I'm baby sitting twerps right now so you can give me a ringer. You may not be to happy about what I say to you so if you have young people around I would go and buy some ear plugs!!!!! |
| I'm doing first-hand research on energy conservation. I'm sleeping. |
| I'm having a wonderful dream, I'll tell you about it when I wake up. |
| I'm hiding from (DAY OF THE WEEK) under the covers. |
| I'm holding my ear up to my pillow, and closing my eyes to see if I can hear the ocean. I will probably be doing this until morning, so leave a message. |
| I'm in Hell- SAVE ME!!! BBL when I'm done babysitting! |
| I'm in the middle of a really long blink. |
| I'm living the single most horrifying night of my life, little demons are going to torment me with constant howling, and screaming, they will throw strange hanffulls of unknown goop at me and the $600 white sofa. This may also be called 'babysitting' |
| I'm not here right now because I am wacking, I mean....putting my little brother to bed..when no one is home..just him and me..hehehe |
| I'm not yawning I'm just exercising my jaw. |
| I'm off getting tortured, beaten up, pinched, annoyed, whined at, frustrated, and I feel like I'm about to blow. oh, in other words, I'm baby-sitting. |
| I'm off in Alphabet Land catching some Zzzzz's. |
| I'm sitting on a baby...uh oh, it looks flat now... |
| I'm sleeping at the moment... so do the right thing and leave a message. |
| I'm spending some quality time with my pillow. |
| I'm testing out my pillow right now...it's probably going to take awhile so leave a quiet message and I'll get back to you later with the results. |
| I'm trying to use as little energy as possible. I'm sleeping. |
| I've got a date with my pillow. |
| I've got an 8 hour ticket to dream land. |
| I've slipped into a coma, but don't call an ambulance. I'd like to stay like this for at least 8 hours. |
| If I got a dollar for every hour I sleep, then I would be a millionaire. |
| If sleeping paid....Then I would be getting paid right now. |
| If sleeping were a class I'd get an A+. |
| If you are reading this, I am dead... Just kidding, I'm sleeping. But people do die in their sleep. Pleasant dreams! |
| If you need me I'll be sleeping, if you really need me I'll still be sleeping, so leave a message. |
| Insomniacs of the world, goodnight. |
| It is said that you can wake up on the right side of the bed, and you can also wake up on the wrong side of the bed... But what happens when you wake up under your bed? |
| It sucks listening to little whiners, but at least I get payed... |
| It's nap time. |
| Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone. |
| Less talk, more sleep. |
| Lets play a game... hide and go sleep. |
| Losing myself in my thoughts, indulging in the sweetness of dreams, dreading the day to come... |
| My parents are always encouraging me. They say that when you are good at something or have a talent, you should keep practicing so you can get better. I listened to them and am practicing sleeping. |
| Now I lay down in my bed, I pray the Lord protect my head. For if out of my bed I fell, My head would hurt and start to swell. |
| Once upon a time, there was a beautiful castle... Oh forget it, good night. |
| People say "The early bird gets the worm." That's great for the bird but what does that mean for me? What if I'm the worm? I'm busy sleeping in. |
| Reality is losing its appeal so I am going to sleep. |
| Recharging. |
| Right now I'm at the neighbors eating they're food and watchin TV or in other words... I'm babysitting! |
| Screaming..Shouting..Yelling..Fighting..Make it stop! *In other words...I'm babysitting BBL |
| Shhh... I'm sleeping, so please leave a message very quietly. |
| Shhh... I've got insomnia and I'm trying to sleep it off. |
| Shhh... Please type quietly... I'm sleeping. |
| Shhhh quiet. I'm sleeping! |
| Shhhhh, I might be beautiful, but I still need my beauty sleep. |
| Sitting on the baby...uh, I mean babysitting |
| Sleep (n) : the natural periodic suspension of consciousness during which the powers of the body are restored. |
| Sleep (n): A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. |
| Sleep - It's what I do when I'm not awake. |
| Sleep - The cure for sleepiness. |
| Sleep is actually a good substitute for coffee. |
| Sleep is just a substitute for insufficient caffine. |
| Sleep; it's what I do when I'm not awake. |
| Sleeping like a baby. |
| Sleepwalking. |
| So this guy on the street tells me there's this new thing going around called sleep. He said "Its like nothing you've ever tried before." So I figured... you only live once, why not try it! Leave a message and I'll get to you in the morning. |
| Sorry I can't chat right now, it's past my bed time. |
| Suffocating my pillow. |
| Sweet dreams are made of sleep. Who am I to disagree? |
| The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. |
| The cow goes moo, the sheep goes baaa, the duck goes quack, and I go Zzzzzzzzz. |
| The early worm gets eaten by the bird. |
| The Lord has called me to my bed so that I may rest my weary head. when the stars go off to sleep and the sun begins to peep, that is when we'll meet again. until that time, goodnight dear friend. |
| The sun has gone to bed and so must I... |
| The time has come for me to take action! ...after I finish my nap. |
| The Transitive Property of Sleep: Me = Human Human = Sleep Me = Sleep |
| The voices in my head are snoring so I guess that means its time for me to go to sleep. |
| They say you snooze you loose. Well... I lost! |
| Toddlers are the hardest of all to babysit! Right now I'm playing horsey (please dont tell anyone!) don't call me because I wont have enough time to answer. |
| Too tired to carry on an intelligent conversation. |
| Too tired to talk. |
| Tossing and turning thinking about nothing but you ...and all of the trouble you've caused me. |
| Unconscious... |
| What is the heaviest thing in the world? Sleepy eyelids. |
| What's the question you can never answer yes to? Are you sleeping? Well if you're reading this right now then you probably want to ask me that. So here it is....Yes, I am sleeping. |
| Why talk when you can sleep? |
| Zzzzzzzzzz... |
