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The Lord's Prayer
Frank Perdue is granted a private audience with the Pope.

"Your Holiness," he says, "I've heard that the church has suffered some real financial reversals, so I am here with a proposal that can benefit both of us. I'm prepared to donate a hundred million dollars to the church, provided you make one small change in the Lord's prayer where it says, 'Give us this day, our daily bread.' Well, I'd like you to consider changing just the end of the line to 'Give us this day our daily chicken.'"

The Pope is taken aback. "That's a most unusual request," he says, "but certainly a substantial kindness that you're offering the church. Let me discuss your offer with the College of Cardinals, and I'll be back in touch with you in a few days."

When Perdue leaves the Pope convenes an emergency meeting of the Cardinals. "Boys," he says, "I think we're going to have to review the Wonder Bread account."

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